Chuck Norris Likes Christmas Too

To the tune of The 12 Days of Christmas:

On the first pain of Christmas, 

Chuck Norris sent to me Destruction with only one knee. 

On the second pain of Christmas, Chuck Norris sent to me 

Two knuckle shoves, 

And destruction with only own knee. 

On the third pain of Christmas, Chuck Norris sent to me 

Three dead men, 

Two knuckle shoves, 

And destruction with only one knee. 

On the fourth pain of Christmas, Chuck Norris sent to me 

Four dying herds, 

Three dead men,

Two knuckle shoves, 

And destruction with only one knee. 

On the fifth pain of Christmas, Chuck Norris sent to me 

Five painful swings, 

Four dying herds, 

Three dead men, 

Two knuckle shoves, 

And destruction with only one knee.

On the sixth pain of Christmas, Chuck Norris sent to me 

Six punch a-hitting, 

Five painful swings, 

Four dying herds, 

Three dead men, 

Two knuckle shoves, 

And destruction with only one knee. 

On the seventh pain of Christmas, Chuck Norris sent to me 

Seven teeth a-spitting, 

Six punch a-hitting, 

Five painful swings, 

Four dying herds, 

Three dead men, 

Two knuckle shoves, 

And destruction with only one knee. 

On the eighth pain of Christmas, Chuck Norris sent to me 

Eight tears a-sulking, 

Seven teeth a-spitting, 

Six punch a-hitting, 

Five painful swings, 

Four dying herds, 

Three dead men, 

Two knuckle shoves, 

And destruction with only one knee. 

On the ninth pain of Christmas, Chuck Norris sent to me 

Nine combat kickings,

Eight tears a-sulking, 

Seven teeth a-spitting, 

Six punch a-hitting, 

Five painful swings, 

Four dying herds, 

Three dead men, 

Two knuckle shoves, 

And destruction with only one knee. 

On the tenth pain of Christmas, Chuck Norris sent to me 

Ten guns a-shooting, 

Nine combat kickings, 

Eight tears a-sulking, 

Seven teeth a-spitting, 

Six punch a-hitting, 

Five painful swings, 

Four dying herds, 

Three dead men, 

Two knuckle shoves, 

And destruction with only one knee. 

On the eleventh pain of Christmas, Chuck Norris sent to me 

Eleven skulls a-cracking, 

Ten guns a-shooting, 

Nine combat kickings,

Eight tears a-sulking, 

Seven teeth a-spitting, 

Six punch a-hitting, 

Five painful swings, 

Four dying herds, 

Three dead men,

Two knuckle shoves,

And destruction with only one knee. 

On the twelfth pain of Christmas, Chuck Norris sent to me 

Twelve bodies crushing, 

Eleven skulls a-cracking, 

Ten guns a-shooting, 

Nine combat kickings, 

Eight tears a-sulking, 

Seven teeth a-spitting, 

Six punch a-hitting, 

Five painful swings, 

Four dying herds, 

Three dead men, 

Two knuckle shoves, 

And destruction with only one knee!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

source: http://www.jokes4us.com/dirtyjokes/dirtychristmascarolsjokes.html

--Rudolph